lamiki

on life, ambitions, and dreams

Flower

Sunday Serial: Passing Judgment on Mojitos and Negative Thinking

Sunday Serial is curated list of the best blogs and articles that I’ve encountered over the past week. Sometimes there’s a theme, but most times there’s not. My goal with these posts is that I introduce you to at least one new idea that you may not have otherwise been exposed to. Enjoy!

Illustration of Ernest Hemingway and his favorite drink, the mojito

10 Things to Do Even if They Judge You

by Marc on Marc and Angel Hack Life

Read this because: The hardest thing in life is to ignore what others think about you and do everything that you want to do. But you know what? It’s OK to ignore what others think about the choices you make (and it’s sometimes fun). Marc gives you a healthy list of 10 things. Here’s a challenge: choose one item from this list and try it out for thirty days. Here’s mine:

5. Adjust your goals and dreams as life changes. – A great deal of pain in life comes from having a specific dream that you’ve fallen in love with, and when it doesn’t work out exactly as planned, you become angry that you now have to pursue a different path.  If you want to tame your inner demons and make the most of life, you must not become rigidly attached to just one specific dream, and remain open to there being an even better, equally as happy path ahead.  Life is unpredictable, but it provides plenty of opportunities to make dreams come true.  Just don’t forget that sometimes taking a positive step forward requires you to slightly adjust your dreams, or plan new ones – it’s OK to change your mind or have more than one dream.

Editors note: I originally chose #10 but changed after re-reading the Power of Negative Thinking (below).

The Bartending Stand Against the Mojito

by Jen Doll on The Atlantic Wire

Read this because: There’s nothing that makes you feel like a literary legend like Ernest Hemingway and refreshed like a sprig of the freshest mint crushed into your rum. Plus, it’s incredible fun to shout loudly in a bar with your best friend from high school (“Mo-heee!-to!”).

But did you know that bartenders everywhere have a vast hatred against this drink? According to the Atlantic Wire, it’s true. And while reading this article makes me want to weep, after hosting a party where the signature drink was hand-shaken (not stirred) mojitos, I can solemnly agree. The mojito, as wonderful and amazing of a drink that it is, is an outcast.

If you are lucky enough to be at a bar where mojitos are on the menu and made for you with pride, enjoy it, for your fellow countrymen may not be as lucky.

The Power of Negative Thinking

by Oliver Burkeman in the New York Times

Read this because: The very concept is baffling. If you want something, shouldn’t you exercise positive visualization? Yes, except that in some situations, visualizing that you achieve a goal may make you feel as though you’ve already achieved it and therefore will be less likely to actually do it.

Is your brain spinning yet? Here’s where the research comes from:

Ancient philosophers and spiritual teachers understood the need to balance the positive with the negative, optimism with pessimism, a striving for success and security with an openness to failure and uncertainty. The Stoics recommended “the premeditation of evils,” or deliberately visualizing the worst-case scenario. This tends to reduce anxiety about the future: when you soberly picture how badly things could go in reality, you usually conclude that you could cope. Besides, they noted, imagining that you might lose the relationships and possessions you currently enjoy increases your gratitude for having them now. Positive thinking, by contrast, always leans into the future, ignoring present pleasures.

If you want something really, really badly, think about the exact opposite and then work hard towards doing everything you can to not make it happen.

This concept sounds really, really weird to me. I mean, that’s like saying if you’re riding a bicycle and you don’t want to think about hitting the tree, think about hitting the tree. Perhaps that’s not the time to think negatively…

But when it comes to something like your relationship, thinking that you and your partner are amazing, strong, and solid may lead you to stop working on it and cause you to miss something huge that could bring about it’s demise. Whereas if you are think about your relationship falling apart (and that’s not what you want), then you will work hard to make sure that it does not.

Okay, I think I understand it now.

What did you read this week?

Illustration via felipson

Tags: , , , , , ,